“But what now? What am I supposed to do with all these feelings?” – J. Han
I am not sure I understand what is happening in the world. It feels like we are somewhere between a blessed pause and a chaotic halt. I am not sure how to govern my time … my resources … or my emotions.
Every day, our status changes, and the extension between “normal days” and here-and-now continues to grow. I keep replaying the moment when one of my sweet students said, “Mrs. Harris, will I ever see you again?” I immediately cast off her question. I told her of course, that there was no doubt. But now there is … and I hate that I didn’t give her just a few more minutes of my time and attention.
My heart hurts for all the laughter and lessons I am going to try to “foster” digitally, but cannot have in person. It doesn’t seem to make sense that the sun is shining, but I’m not able to drive past the borders of my own town … that the flowers are beginning to bloom, but every known establishment is closing … that the weather is turning to Spring … to hope, but the economy crumbles around us. It is a paradox, this situation. This life.
Try to find the good. Try to remain in the might be’s and the someday soon’s. Nothing is ever as bad as it seems and we have a chance to encourage one another in a way none of us have ever been tested to before. Most of us were not raised in war-torn nations. Most of us have never known true hunger or poverty. Most of us have never been challenged to remain still, and silent, and waiting. I know I never have to this magnitude.
And so … we are commissioned and governed to be patient. God help me it is not my strength, but “this too shall pass,” and until it does, I’ll be here to offer you a digital hug and prayer. Stay with me friends, we will be one another’s very courage.
All my love,