For the start of a new month, still relatively new to the year, I decided to give myself a little challenge to share seven days of small truths. I think honesty is not only rare, but undervalued. Though I’m not even sure these truths will matter to anyone, they matter to me, and so, at the risk of being too transparent, I plan to share them anyway!
Sometimes I am surrounded with truths about myself that even I don’t understand. And that in and of itself is the epitome of confusion, isn’t it? Truth. Something you know to be so, and yet … don’t necessarily comprehend. Be that as it may, here is the reality I find myself keeping company with. The what is always easier than the why, to be sure. I am forever working on my “why’s.”
C’est la Vie.
DAY ONE Truth: I have little to no tolerance for shallow conversation. I find it tedious, needlessly exhausting, and–after about two minutes–yearn to “get to the good stuff.” I would 100% rather know the song to your life’s soundtrack than how work went for you today. I’ve never understood why we waste precious time with getting-to-know-you ice-breakers instead of starting out with relevance. Is it because we don’t trust one another with something real? Probably. Is it that we don’t trust ourselves to share something real for the fear of being judged. Even more likely. Still, I don’t think things need to be this way. I believe in the possibility to have genuine conversation that moves proverbial mountains, shakes the foundations of societal norms, and makes day-to-day conversations a whole lot more interesting. Imagine a world where, “Hi, how are you?” instead becomes, “Hi, if you had to name the purpose of your life today, what would it be?” Am I a naive optimist … 100%. But I’d still like to know. 🙂
What about you? Where do you lie on chit-chat? Could you idle and swim in the shallow end forever, or … like me … do you long for the deep end of discussion where substance and intention collide? If so, what question do you wish was a daily occurrence?
Tell me how you REALLY are.
I am overwhelmed by the passage of time, and the reality that I cannot do a thing to change it. ❤️ Thank you for the honest question.
Takes courage to go deep, be vulnerable with our truth; and not just anybody or everybody will appreciate or value that. There’s always the inner question, “Is it worth it?” And yet, if we want a deeper, real relationship with someone, we have to risk it, regardless of the outcome. It’s easier, much easier, to not engage deeper and stay with surface stuff–and being selective when and who is worth a risk. I love your invitation question “What’s the soundtrack of your life?” It’s open and allows one to answer easier. A starting place for easing into deeper maybe. I’ll start with “I’ve had the time of my Life” (Bill Medley) and Everyday Goddess (Celia)–though I’m more a ‘woman of wisdom’ (another great song) at this life stage. Thank you always for sharing your truth, Elle. You inspire.
Anne, THANK YOU! You are always real and intentional. You are the kind of soul that requires hot tea and an open mind. Thank you for sharing your heart. ❤️
I feel “Hi How are you” gets the kinks out, helps us to settle in. Unfortunately a lot of the times we don’t get to the better and or bigger questionns. How ever in all honesty , if the question “how are you” is not just a greeting but a reaching out I think that it is spectacular.
Sometimes taking a breather is all I have in that moment.
I agree! I love the people who don’t just ask me, but actually STAY to hear the answer. There’s gravity to the tone and posture of how a question is asked. ❤️
“I have little to no tolerance for shallow conversation.” Loved it!
I was so glad that you shared this truth. I have little to no tolerance for small talk and chit-chat. I find it completely draining. What I want in life is authenticity and genuine interactions that are about who people really are not the weather. Even if is a momentary or brief encounter. What I am finding is that the more authentically I show up, the more others around me do as well.
Yes! I agree! People tend to reflect what you’re willing to give. ☺️