4.12.21 It Has to Be Alright

1

I think it’s there

just barely visible

on the edge of a cloud line

on the faintest curve of a smile

that hint

that glint

of light, and hope, and

something

better

is

coming

for no other reason than

it

has

to

Judge as you may,

I’m not prone to naivety,

but rather the need to rely on my faith –

which I admit

can sometimes look the same …

But it feels entirely different

Trust me –

or don’t

but know that I know myself

and the only way I can carry on

is to believe

in the edge

in the curve

in the light

in it has to be alright

soon

3.13.21 Beyond

8

Sometimes I wish that we lived in a world where there weren’t quite so many conventions … so many “unwritten” rules of decorum and what is or is not: expected, accepted, or normalized. This is where children have it right. They rush into conversation with reckless abandon, all tangled hair and thoughts … all colorful, vibrant questions. I want to meet someone and push beyond the “getting to know you” phase immediately. I want to grab their hand, look directly into their eyes, and ask them if the ocean calls their spirit like it does mine. I want to know if they too feel magic in the wind and believe in the possibility that Fate and Destiny like to play.

But those are not ordinary questions, and so instead, I fear many of us remain on the surface … knowing, but also not knowing each other fully. I want to live in a world where those kinds of questions don’t end in a quandary of someone looking at me as though I am not “fully sane.” Why can’t we know? Why can’t we ask? Why can’t we feel fully and cannonball into grand discussions edged in gold, instead of politely tiptoeing around generalities that keep us shallowly acceptable?

Can I just say … I’d love to fight normal? I’d love to wrestle the glass barriers of the mundane in preference of the glorious, curious questions I wish I could ask. What invokes passion in you? What draws you to the edge of yourself? Do you believe our mortal bodies contain immortal relevance and what in this glorious, terrible life has led you to your conclusions?

Albeit to say, I would irrevocably love to push beyond to the good stuff … but the world might have to spin a little faster (or maybe it’s slower) before that happens. And yet, if you find yourself in need of a little bit more … of a little bit deeper … just know there’s someone out there who feels the same and is happy to follow your wondering, wandering thoughts. Beyond seems like an awfully enchanting place to go.

Come with me?

Elle

3.8.21 Grateful Gifting

9

I was supremely blessed this past week when two orders came in for quote stacks from my mini shop, This Quotable Life Boutique. Every time someone reaches out to me for a personalized gift, I feel so remarkably grateful … grateful that I was thought of in the place between giver and gift. From personalized poetry to wedding vows – I have been able to walk in some of the most fragile, remarkable moments with individuals who deemed me worthy of entering into their journey. What could be more satisfying than that?

And so, I thank you … all of you who read my words … who ask me to keep writing. Whether in response to a piece in Bella Grace Magazine that touched your heart, or a blog post of mine that found you at just the right time, you, my sweet readers, keep me writing – keep me inspired – keep me dreaming of what is to come.

My circle of influence may not be large, but every time I’m asked to write, or told that my words found their way to someone at just the right time – I am in awe. I am humbled and endlessly grateful for the chance to matter in the moment.

So here’s to you – my lovers of words, of dreams, and the places that draw us between them.

Sending you sparkles,

Elle

2.28.21 Somedays

0

I have several friends who suffer from chronic illnesses, and honestly, I hurt for them in a place I can’t feel, but feel nonetheless. So this is for you my brave warriors. This is for the days your body becomes a cage to the spirit within you that knows peace is waiting for you someday. I love you. I hear you. Carry on precious … one more day … one more hour … one more breath if that’s all you can commit to. This is not all – you are more, and nothing, not even this pain can make you less. For you, dear ones, are made of beyond. Until then, I bless you for enduring now. I would be lost without you, and I thank you for not letting me get lost. 

Somedays

Somedays are dangerous things

they tease and taunt

and ease and haunt

the imperfections of our current state

of being

of wanting

of waiting

And on days like that …

the Somedays 

when the magic of stardust and wishes call

when the perfection of heaven echoes in the loves we lost

when the sea and the sky brim at a capacity greater than any earthly ambition

my heart aches with a craving I can’t satisfy

at the freedom I see

but don’t have

at the wonders of when

but not yet

at the whims I imagine

but can’t

make

real

Some days,

when Someday comes

my skin feels too tight

and my tears fall just right

and living 

is heavier

than it seems it should have the right to ever be

because beauty is in the eye of the beheld

and I wish to be held

by something lighter

than gravity

Someday

Reflections to Consider

1. Who do I know that might be depending on “Someday?” 

2. How can I make today worth their struggle to stay? 

3. What words, quotes, poems, or songs might I cover them in?

4. If I were to pray for them, what would I say? 

5. What wildflowers, free and blooming might inspire their view of today? 

6. What memories could I share to remind them of better moments in time? 

7. What does hope sound like? Smell like? Feel like? Look like? Can I catch some to share? 

8. If I visited, what activities could we do together where we were equal and free? 

9. What movies and books define our relationship? What else could I add to a care package that would enable and empower? 

10. What are ways to love them purely, as they are, and were, and will be … without filter or flaw? How can I show them that they are still them? And I am still me? And we are still us? 

2.16.21 Love You, For Me

8

Love You, For Me

Beautiful

I need you to do something for me

and I know it isn’t easy, but I’m asking just the same.

If I could do it myself,

I would.

If I could ask someone else … it would never be enough.

And so I come to you – 

for you.

I need you to love you, for me.

I need you to recognize the impossibly, impractically, imperfectly-perfect person you are …

not just to me,

but to anyone who knows you truly – to anyone who has seen the magic you alone possess. 

I need you to imagine with me, that you are already there … 

that you have nothing to prove, and no one left to impress, 

except yourself. 

There is no one on earth who has, or ever could:

do what you do

think what you think

feel what you feel

imprint hope or impart wisdom the way that you can.

I need you to believe me.

I need you to hold on, for me.

I need you to recognize that reflection in the mirror for the exquisite treasure she is.

Do not dispel her value, 

diminish her worth

or doubt her purpose. 

Because I love her, 

but I need you to love her,

for me. 

1.27.21 What’s Next

8

What’s Next

I am a what’s next girl

for better … 

or worse

It is something I am equally proud

and 

utterly 

embarrassed of

While delighted in every new 

light (and sometimes too bright)

idea

I also cannot settle

Is it an asset? 

A flaw? 

Am I curating curiosity? 

Or chasing the thrill 

of a thread that never ends?

Am I incomplete somehow? 

Or … somewhere? 

Yes.

And no.

And does it matter if I’ll never know?

My heart throbs with an urgency 

to do

to create

to run and build and learn

My mind spins with a frantic need

to write

to read

to pray and meditate and understand that I never will

I want answers

but find they matter less than my questions

I want to get there

but not as much as I want to explore

From wander 

to wish

and back again

I come and go

inside and outside 

skipping stones across my imagination

and feeling the ripples in reality, 

until only one question remains – 

What’s next? 

12.16.20 Words

5

Words

can be frightfully insufficient things

especially when you need them to mean more

or less

especially in the wake of what you didn’t mean to say

or did

but wish you didn’t 

And whether you form them 

into long sentences that ribbon and curl with intention

Or punctuate them in short, sharp points you made

and can’t take back

they remain too much

they remain not enough

leaving you full

and somehow completely empty 

all at once

11.16.20 I Need You to Know

3

Sometimes one spirit, 

one flesh

feels too far away when in two bodies

And your mind is a mess with stress

and mine is just

tired

And it amazes me just how possible 

impossible days come

and go

and come back again

Like a chill neither of us meant to catch

but caught

n  o  n  e  t  h  e  l  e  s  s

On days like these days

I can’t find you . . . 

though you’re right in front of me

you’re not beside

and your thoughts reside

e  l  s  e  w  h  e  r  e

And there is not somewhere I can go with you –

because you didn’t invite me

It’s not a burden I can help you bear

because you took it on alone

Still somehow I carry the weight

of waiting

for you to set it down

to look at me

to let me back in

I’m sorry

for offenses both real

and made real by believing I meant to offend

I’m sorry

for moments lost

and more

for moments thrown away

If I tell you that I love you

could it help?

Could it heal? 

because I know you know

but knowing doesn’t seem like enough

I need you to know

and I need me

to be 

e  n  o  u  g  h

10.26.20 A Halloween Wish

4

Once upon the mid of Autumn

when the leaves are crisp and bright

step by stomp and twirl by creeping

screams and giggles filled the night

And the streets were filled with wonder

creatures from each walk of life …

some enchanting, some were haunting,

some brought laughter, others strife

Whether fair and dainty maiden

or a bold and ghastly ghost

when feathered, furred, or filled with scales

each deserves what they wish most

When the stars begin their winking

and the wind unfurls its breeze

moonbeams with their shadows dancing

sway and hush among the trees

This is the extent of magic

wrapped in spirits present, past

and the hope of all the dreamers

is that time will not move fast

Let this night be one of many

where pretend can dwell and play

make-believe and just imagine

are invited here to stay

Once upon the mid of Autumn

when the leaves are crisp and bright

let them stay like this forever

believing with their hearts, not sight

10/18/20 Mother Nature’s Curtain Call

5

Fall is Mother Nature’s curtain call
As Summer is a vibrant imprint of Spring’s entrance
Fall is Summer’s hushed echo
a crescendo of excess color
an overspill of emotion
a symphony of beauty so strong
it is almost painful to look at
Twirling in muted tones …
in the bittersweetness only an exit knows,
Fall arrives only as an in-between can –
as swift as a skipped heartbeat
as sweet as an almost-kiss
Blushing in tides of burnt persimmon, sugared cranberries, and dusted cinnamon her performance rises on winds of change
and promises an audience stunned to silence
at the stillness of coming Winter
Enamel glazed branches will applaud her long after the white curtain has fallen 

Pressed leaves in thick books will recall her essence
And the memory of her spirit will rest within the golden stars
just waiting to be wished on when warm nights with cool breezes return With a last turn,
with a final bow,
she leaves just as lovely as she came
Elegant and endless in the land of in-between